Want to be happier? Don’t take selfies.
This is not meant to offend you.
Let me clarify what I mean by a selfie. I refer to the type of photo that features just yourself pulling an abnormal face, pretending it’s normal.
Just because it’s common place, due to social media, it’s doesn’t mean it’s acceptable.
Let’s say you think you look particularly nice, enjoy it, for yourself.
Do not take a picture of yourself and post it publicly. By doing this all you’re doing is looking for approval from others.
Whether you get many or no, “Likes” for your selfie is immaterial. It’s the act of needing the approval that’s impacting your happiness.
With others approval, you feel better, without it you feel worse.
Why put your self esteem in the hands of others?
This only fuels our insecurity, which makes us feel out of control.
Everyone has insecurities but if you let them rule you, it’s impossible to be happy.
This is why it’s usual for insecure people to become control freaks.
We believe if we can control our environment we can feel more secure.
The truth is we can’t control our environment and trying to do so will result in stress and or depression.
We can only control certain aspects of our lives and they’re all to do with us, not others.
There’s only 3 areas we can control, that will contribute towards our happiness.
We control what put into our bodies both, physically and mentally.
It’s been proven that healthy foods not only improve our physical condition but mental well being too.
The mind like the body can be exercised.
What we regularly choose to fill our heads with can be constructive or destructive.
If we read gossip columns or watch soap operas, we become used to judging and comparing. We put others down only to give our, insecure, selves a lift.
If we choose to read about inspirational figures or watch enlightening programmes, then we tend to want to improve and lift ourselves at no cost to others.
Getting enough sleep is essential for mental and physical well being.
Regularly exercising makes us feel mentally and physically stronger.
By relying on others approval we’re essentially relying on them for our happiness, which means it’s their happiness, we’re hoping to borrow.
Our happiness needs to be created by us and this starts with us learning to be self-assured.
Self-assurance starts with self acceptance and this comes from overall well being, the foundations for which are built on the three steps above.
We need to learn to let go of the things we can’t control and take control of the things we can.
An old Cherokee chief was teaching his grandson about life…
“A fight is going on inside me,” he said to the boy, “It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves.
One is evil – he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, self-doubt, and ego.
The other is good – he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith.
This same fight is going on inside you – and inside every other person, too.”
The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, “Which wolf will win?”
The old chief simply replied, “The one you feed.”