What’s the ONE thing making you unhappy?

The last few days I’ve been quite down.

I don’t know how often I have periods like these because they’re not consistent but I have them often enough to know they’re regular.


When I feel like this I experience dark moods, question the point of everything and have difficulty seeing the positive in anything.

It feels like my optimistic horizon is at my feet, like my prospects.

Today I emerged from this negative fog and the good news is, it didn’t just happen naturally.

I believe I did something that brought about my sunnier disposition.

This morning as I stood in the shower, the water barely touching me, I decided to vent.

I decided to be deliberately negative.


For the few minutes I spent in the shower, I hated anything and everything I felt I had to.

On the list of things I hated were:


Christmas parties


As I stepped out of the shower I consciously decided to leave this negative me behind.

It’s as if I needed a limited amount of time where I could release the negative energy that had built up inside me.

I do not believe this, on it’s own, was the key to me feeling better.

I think it was stage one of a two part process.

As I cycled into work I thought, “What am I unhappy about? What’s the ONE thing that’s making me unhappy?”

I suddenly knew what it was but I believe it took the negative venting in the shower, to reveal it.

Oddly it wasn’t one of the things I vented about.

It’s as if this, main issue, was the cause and source feeding all the other negativity I had.

So now I had the root of the problem I asked myself this question:

Can I do anything about it?

The answer was, “Yes”.

All of a sudden I felt better.


So the problem was not THE problem. The problem was did I have control over the problem?

There’s only two possible answers to this: Yes or No.

If you think you can exert some control over it then it great – if you have no control over it then there’s not point wasting time worrying about it.

Feeling out of control is an insecurity issue and we’re never alone in feeling insecure.

One of the best quotes I read recently was:

“It’s not a question of whether we are insecure or not, it’s a question of how insecure we are”.


If you’re unhappy at the moment try pinpointing the ONE thing that’s making you unhappy and ask yourself if you can do something about it.

If you’re not sure what it is try deliberately venting all the negative issues you have.

I’m pretty sure this is what worked for me. If it does (or doesn’t) work for you I’d love to hear from you.

My email is: justinadamwaite@gmail.com



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